Archive for August, 2006

Day Three: Threshold of Adventure

August 28, 2006

Check the time, sigh,
and roll hard my face
into this package of marshmallows
exposed to the air and
stiff over time, like my neck.
I grumble and eat my way out.

An axe, rusted
acting as a paper weight
for a thesis I refuse to read,
I dislike the smell of iron anyway,
thus the spray bottle
of mulched flowers
that doesn’t clean,
just makes things smell that way.

Candles were blown
merely for a few
now relit, less perfect, and I’m back at it,
questing for holy grails,
and hungry,
always hungry in the morning,
if that’s what you can call this,
because I don’t know this place.
A peeled orange sits distant in the sky,
I reach out and grab it
and squeeze juice in my eye.

Still with the growling,
the needs for this clay,
yet- not yet- I say.
The guardians wake
to patrol the gold
coins, tonic chips
that heal my wounds,
that anchor down
my clay to sand
if only briefly.

The growl turns up,
heads left and out
through a window, down
and merges with a murmur moan
of distress
of a man
with growl his own.
I see him not, yet still,
I see him and his shackles, cell,
and dogs with masks of iron.
He, like I,
craves gold.

Pathetic Repetition

August 21, 2006

(I think this poem is fairly straight forward and as such it feels inferior in my head. I’m experimenting with this here to see how it works. It’s another piece that feels like it could be more. I may just be using these last two as communications more so than any real poetic accomplishment.)

i thought i was awake,
but i was asleep for five days.
it’s not that bad a deal,
you get to eat, drink, walk around
in a headache haze,
perpetual 4 minutes before bed,
all day
for five days straight.

you get to yell at made-up creatures
invented by you, for you,
and blame them for everything.
you get to sit in the same chair
at the same desk
in the same room
creating problems,
creating creatures,
and pinning the tale.
you get to repeat yourself
and consider it new.
you get to write terribly
unimportant, uninspired, trivial nonsense
about the only thing
the fuzz in your head can focus on:
sleep
all day
for five days straight.

to lay down and finally rest-
to really rest-
and get rest-
and be at rest-
rest
on something soft would be nice,
something that won’t kink
my everything
every single time i try
for five days straight.

and then when it happens,
the glorious event
where i drain five times more fuel
than this body can hold
and the machine just dies,
i can stop,
and thus
i miss and uncountable amount
of otherwise intended events
all because my clocks paused on japan
in this apparent chance on chance
in this death that’s not sleep
(and nowhere near rest)
i curse at myself for being too weak
to not fight on for more
to get these clocks realigned
and stop missing out on life.

if the day is a year
and the year is a day
which would you choose,
fake sleep or the haze?
i may as well “sleep”
all day
for five days straight.

The Crash

August 19, 2006

I just got home. I just wrote this. It’s rough, it’s barely edited. I don’t care. I’m still wiping the occasional tears. I feel it’s important to share. I don’t know why.

what do you do when
there’s no god in the sky
you hit a pothole
and hope the tale flies
of a time you were cut off
by fictitious black cars
with fictitious black drivers
that sent you too far

air bags blow hard
and smack hand to glass
like every time
god said don’t pass
stay where you are
you are not to proceed
forever condemned
to need what you need

what do you do
did you hear me, I said
what do you do

when tears choke your words
in the passenger seat
and you shield from the one
you don’t want to see
but he knows, and they know,
they know, they see the blood
they see stains,
the bandage covering grains
of the crusty white tape
barely hanging to skin
and all of the doubt
creeping within

what do you do
when your truth needs deceit
when your hopes for escape
lie in the hands of the weak
the ignorant, the dull
hoping they buy
your stories of others
passing you by
on the streets in the night
when no one is around
and the only thing heard
is metallic crashing sound
of front end into walls
that save you from death
better reserved
for those who repent
and pray to the one
who keeps the car safe
and pray to the one
who knows all your ways
but fails to predict
the clashing of parts
of car, of bone,
of brotherly hearts
that lead to a night
tearful and grand
that no other tragedy
could ever have planned.

Big City

August 14, 2006

big city lights,
tall buildings comprised of nothing but
steel, cement, glass,
paved ground everywhere
ten feet thick.
even the green is contrived
and set aside
to places none can find
in this big city.
raver glow stick street life,
neon temptations,
and everyone is lost
asking for directions as if
this is the first time
looking skyward in amazement,
eating food that tastes much better than home,
breathing crisp freedom in the air
filled with
too many poisons to count.
but this is the big city,
everthing is welcome-
spikey pink punks,
plastic virgin violets
pinstripes and violins,
fax machine violence.
everyone now calls this home.
not remembering
towns, villages, love left behind
the way the sun tastes,
the way green feels and smells
and how it fits nicely no matter the size
and how it’s the easiest color on the eyes.
this is the big city.
no one remembers
when i remind them
we’re all from out of town.

Day Two: The Descent

August 7, 2006

The muffin man sold me bagels for my ears.
I wear them with phlegmatic disdain, disillusioned
from my little poppy seed addiction.

Decimal meets heximal,
violent red lines change stances and attack,
constantly, forever.
A tiny red dot appears,
maintains 12 stoic hours,
and vanishes in a flash.

Water regains its multitude of colors
from before we needed it to survive,
loses them again, then
flows in various directions from my head.

Laying here on a bed
of pleasantly scented candles, all rose red,
wick’d to a perfect inch, and lit.
Suspended, I, above with alligator skin
heated nicely for a change,
cold blood that normally runs these veins.

I could fall asleep, or perhaps,
I could fall to peace,
and I could let this wax song caress my scales,
but dragon-dice bones never bounced up doubles,
so I will just fall awake,
falling so much better beyond the sandbox anyway.